The fae hadn’t been able to sleep well for days, no matter how hard she worked or how exhausted she felt. The precious few hours of slumber she did manage to get were filled with nightmares. Her dreams were haunted by her deceased packmates. They seemed to call out to her, although for what she wasn’t always sure. Even now, in a warm light of of the setting sun, the Elite found no peace. She huffed and stalked into her den, not wanting the wolves within the clearing to watch her. They didn’t need to see how distraught their Elite was. Her paws moved in a steady rhythm as she paced within the den, curving her path around the shallow dip in the ground which she slept in. Normally she would find comfort in the roomy, yet cozy space. The small alcoves and a few niches along the walls of the den were decorated with crystal-filled rocks and bones of animals she caught. Among the bones were two fox skulls (from a day when she had found the two thieves raiding their camp prey pile at dawn), a weasel skull, and the antlers of a deer. She did not feel at ease here. All these decorations, trophies, and the various pelts and furs (which lined her sleeping spot and draped over a large boulder in the back if her den) couldn’t help her relax.

Breeze paused to give herself a shake, trying to think of anything but the images that haunted her mind and the troublesome thoughts that buzzed in her brain like angry hornets. She could patrol, but she had already done so multiple times. Hunting was a painful reminder of her lost friend. It was unbearable. Between the images that flashed in her head, and the emotions which raged in her heart, the fae felt trapped. The grey female whined, realizing she had no way to escape her own thoughts. Did my parents ever feel like this? How many packmates did they lose? Who was there for them? Breeze wondered as she began to pace again. I’m sure they had wolves to talk to, to help them get through it. But who do I even have left to turn to? The fae stopped as the realization dawned on her. She had to do what she should have done earlier. She needed to talk to Desmond.

Her paws led her to the entrance of her den, pausing as she scanned the clearing. Much to her relief, only few wolves were around. Her mouth remained in a slight frown as she trotted towards the Alpha’s den. Why bother trying to smile when it would only look fake? An exhausted sigh escaped her maw as she slowed to a walk. The only two stark differences in her appearance. Her tail no longer swayed cheerfully and her amber eyes no longer held any of their typical sparkle and brightness. The Elite stopped about half a tail’s length away from the entrance to the Alpha’s den. Her grey ears flicked back uncertainly as she sat down. “Alpha Desmond? Are you there?” She called out quietly. “I…I would like to speak with you. There is something you should hear about…” Her words trailed off into silence as she let her head drop and her eyes close for a moment. Breeze glanced up again, watching for any signs of the brute. It was getting late, but perhaps he was out hunting or patrolling or something. Still, the she-wolf remained seated in the tall grass, her pelt seemingly brown in the golden amber rays of the sinking sun. She wanted to sink to her belly, yet she didn’t budge. The fae would wait a little longer. Hopefully she wouldn’t have to go search for the earthen colored brute.

The fae hadn't been waiting long, and almost as soon as she glanced back up, the voice of her leader floated from the darkness of the den. Surprised at his request for her to enter the den, her ears perked and eyes widened momentarily as she rose to her paws. After a second of hesitation, Breeze padded up to the mouth of the den and took a step into the dark abode of her Alpha. Her tail hung limply and her ears flicked backward ever so slightly as her Amber orbs shushed to the shadows. A slight smile, a respectful bow of her head, and a quiet and grateful "thank you" was given in greeting to the large male that sat inside. How was she to explain this? What was she supposed to say?

Her ears flattened even more and she sat down tiredly, her eyes focused on the floor of the den. "Well sir...it's complicated. I'm sure you have been aware of this, but awhile ago Altair died to save me from a bear. I should have been the one to take the attack, but he distracted the beast...it reacted fast and I was too slow." Her words were quiet and her expression one of shame and sorrow as she glanced up at Desmond. "I didn't even get to thank him." She murmured dejectedly. It was a struggle to push away the flashes of memory that attempted to infiltrate her thoughts, but she managed.

There was only a slight pause before she sat up a bit straighter, her expression even darker. "That's not where it ends. I had encountered Sieglinde a couple days later....and had to tell her of the attack." The female added with a shake of her head. "I had to tell her. She...." Her head hung so that her chin almost touched her chest. "She had feelings for him...and I think it crushed her." Breeze whispered while staring at the ground. If she could have cried, the tears would already have started to flow. Yet instead she could only bite back a whimper. "I knew it would hurt her, and I tried to be there, to help her get through it....but it wasn't enough. I found her at Altair's den..." She choked. She paused again to swallow past the lump in her throat before glancing up once more. "She was dead, sir. No signs of struggle, but..." Her words trailed off into silence as she shut her eyes in shame and guilt. She remained like this, unable to speak more.' It's all my fault.